I have been here, regaining a sense of ease, and trust. Trus..
Added 2021-05-18 17:25:08 +0000 UTCI have been here, regaining a sense of ease, and trust. Trust, truly starts with the self, and I have been on edge lately, anxiety ridden, and struggling. Somehow the veil seems to be lifting, and as I return to old practices, they suddenly all feel new. I didn’t start practicing nude because I thought it was sexy or worthy of looking at. I began it as a means to fully connect with myself and gain autonomy of my own body. To see it in a way that felt real true and indeed beautiful not to others, but to myself. Going on my 4th year of sex work, this body has carried me through it all, and particularly with this kind of work you will feel pressured to change what you have to make the work easier and the money come faster. However, I have been fervent about maintaining this body that I already have because truly, it is worthy and beautiful in its own right, and I would feel a sense of betrayal to self changing something that was already wildy intricate, individual and able. This is a mediation excercise I love to do when I want to not only protect myself from internalizing idealisms that are not in line with my authenticity, but also to tap in and re-center and regain autonomy. Laying hands on oneself can be really transformative, and can also remind you to slow down, look at your self and be here, now. That is mostly what practicing nude does for me. I have to drop all of my inhibitions, my pretenses, there is no posing, no sucking in, no editing, no curating, nothing but me. And to let go fully, to melt in is not something that many of us even realize we have access to. I encourage you to try this meditation exercise, and feel free to message me with any questions or what your experience was like ❤️
