Ahhhhh morning! Some pics from bed while I’m trying to wake ..

Ahhhhh morning! Some pics from bed while I’m trying to wake up🖤 I need to like stop crying so I can put on makeup lmfao my eyes are swollen as fuckkkkk 😭 Everything going on has prob made last month the most challenging for me mentally and physically, I have been almost a year sober and didn’t even crave booze at all during this shit, everything collapsing at once lol that’s how it goes always 😅 it can’t be one thing EVERYTHING MUST GET WORSE 🤣🤣🤣 so I’m really really proud of myself for not relapsing, this is the longest I’ve EVER gone since I started drinking when I was 16 lol fuck 🙈 Thank youuuu so much everyone who wanted to come join here, and be a part of my more personal life. I’ll be posting today all content available I have EVER LOL bout to tackle organizing my 3tb kn my google drive to get it on the external 😅😅😅 I have 200 videos NOT EDITED Just SITTING for YouTube ugh 😂😂 if I edited them I would never have time to art 😅 I hope everyone has a good weekend!!! I am going to try to start to heal from the mental fuckery I was put through for the past two months, it finally hit me yesterday how I was basically fuxking used as a jerk off tool (I know that was my job but that’s the exact reason I am so upset) to form an emotional connection with someone while having an agenda with them is so disgusting to me cause idc about sex anymore or anything super physical, camming has turned me into a stone man 😂 but I was felt to be able to open up, be vulnerable,. The girlfriend put her profile public and legit he is her WORLD she has absolutely nothing except him. It’s pretty innnnsane how this was kept from me because their whole relationship is put out on display, just on private profiles. And he hates the relationship he’s in, she had zero idea, and zero respect for herself to stay with him, but that ain’t my problem anymore . I felt bad but now I don’t, they were LIVING TOGRTHER when I sent him two pieces of art, which she told me he’s thrown out (it was probably her) I didn’t hear back from him for two days after he supposedly got the cross, which was the first red flag. I’m so upset that I sent him things that meant something to me and absolutely was all a lie to him 😔 tk hear they got thrown out tho is another level of violating feels that really REAaallyyy hurt, considering he tricked me and hurt ME. goddamnit. I just want me art back 😢 lol